Something more

I love this quote by Breneé Brown and image from Alex @magnolialetterarts // it was the perfect reminder today that the Lord has written out story and we do not have to “hustle for our worthiness” any longer!

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Psalm 139:13-15

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This morning as I stood in front of my closet scanning all the options, I found myself just silently weeping, frustrated with myself and my appearance, feeling less than worthy and confused as to how I got here. I think the Enemy loves to distract us like this before we are supposed to walk into worship with the Lord. Self pity is not always my go-to, on days I feel overwhelmed I usually just take a nap and try to do something I enjoy. Of course I have moments of insecurity and seasons where I’m less than confident in my worth or value, but today I felt like a thirteen year old girl with no confidence, no security and no real understanding of why this was the case. 

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30

I spend a good portion of my week meeting with college students and listening to their problems and struggles, often speaking truth and confronting misunderstandings of Scripture. I could recite verses of self-worth and confidence in Christ backwards and forwards after practically growing up in the church, so it’s like preaching to the choir if you’re telling me that we are fearfully and wonderfully made.

I’ve been undeservedly blessed with a loving family who raised me in the church, told me I was loved and valued and precious to the Lord. My kind and patient husband is overflowing with uplifting words, even this morning, sensing my frustration, he came and hugged me and told me I was beautiful. I spend time with the Lord and know these truths on a deeper level. But somehow, somewhere, there’s been a disconnect. All this to say, I know I’m not perfect or awesome and don’t claim to be! But the typical pieces of the puzzle that point to low self-worth have not been in the picture most of my life.

This morning, it hit me hard that I haven’t been resting in the Lord. I haven’t come to Him with my weary soul and asked for Him to carry my burden. I’ve turned just about everywhere else… Ethan, my job, instagram, my friends… But everything falls short when it comes to dwelling in rest and peace because all of those things are not God!

God it’s so hard living with a longing heart, everything I think I need feels so strangely out of reach, so God help me now realize that this may be how you show me I was made for something more. (Something More, Francesca Battestelli) 

I have a deep love for Francesca Battestelli and feel she has a song that speaks perfectly to just about every possible scenario in my life. This song was no exception this morning. As I sat in the car with some unexpected spare time from a cancelled breakfast, this song played and I just sat before our Father with open hands and teary eyes. Because this world is not the end, this is not the home I’m made for. When we have those feelings of sadness and insecurity, it’s because there’s a part of us that longs for something more than the here and now. There’s a part of us that’s at home with our Father, so the part of us that’s here on earth is incompletely waiting for something better. This was unexpectedly refreshing and hopeful to remember this morning.

I love how C.S. Lewis puts it:

If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that we were made for another world.

So this morning I’m praying for a patient heart, asking the Lord to speak His confidence and value into my life and remembering that the places and people we turn to apart from Christ will never satisfy. The words we tell ourselves in the mirror, unless the truth found in Scripture, are often an incorrect estimation of our worth and value. God has made us in His perfect image, He knows us as we are and loves us as His own precious children. He invites us into something more that we don’t yet have, but are guaranteed. So if you find yourself having days of weariness and feel like you aren’t enough, maybe you need the same reminder I do today; He cares, He sees, and He says otherwise.  

The Lord appeared to him from far away. I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you. Jeremiah 31:3

Cast your burden on the LORD, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved.  Psalm 55:22

The LORD upholds all who are falling and raises up all who are bowed down. The eyes of all look to you, and you give them their food in due season. You open your hand; you satisfy the desire of every living thing. The LORD is righteous in all his ways and kind in all his works. The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desire of those who fear him; he also hears their cry and saves them. Psalms 145:14-19

I made this for my phone background, as a reminder for those days I have taken my eyes off the King and focused too much on myself. Those days usually end in tears, and always end in a misdirected attention of my heart. When we fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith and the creator of our lives, He satisfies and fills us with His perfect love, giving us total satisfaction in who He is and whose we are. Be encouraged today, He is good and He loves you!

Psalm 139 Screenlock

Psalm 139 RGB

I pray these can encourage you – either around your home or on your phone, wherever you will see the reminder that you are made in His perfect image – fearfully and wonderfully! His works are good and He does not make mistakes!

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3 thoughts on “Something more

  1. First, let me say that I love your blog and I thank you for being transparent. This post spoke directly to me and confirms what God has been teaching me for two weeks! Only Jesus satisfies and can fulfill our every need and desires. I struggle with insecurity and turning to everyone/thing and putting God’s power last. I know that God won’t leave us how we are and will continue to transform us and bring His truth to light in our lives. Please keep posting & God bless!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you for your kind words of encouragement. I know that is such a hard battle for so many women and it’s so easy to listen to everyone and everything else about who we should be instead of finding that in the Lord! I’m thankful that you could be encouraged through that post and so appreciate your encouragement! I pray the Lord continues to speak worth and value into your life!!

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